Sunday, November 1, 2009

Do you feel JOY?

I recently participated in a five-week discussion about becoming authentic, loving ourselves and feeling JOY. It seemed more women were willing to discuss what was wrong with them than speak about joy. Does that mean we don’t allow ourselves to feel joy, we don’t know what it is or we just don’t want to discuss it?

About fifteen years ago when I was in therapy, my therapist asked me when I last felt joy. I think I said “when my daughters were born” That was true enough but actually pretty sad since my daughters were teens by then. Don’t get me wrong. I felt good about a lot of things. But JOY? Did I have joy on too high a pedestal? Like ecstasy or some profound emotion only experienced if you witnessed the face of God?
Since then I have worked on many issues in my life: depression, disability, patience, finding serenity, forgiveness, peace, stillness, loving myself and have finally realized in the last few months, I have been experiencing JOY!

It has come in short small bursts like little bubbles and at times loud explosions similar to fireworks. Both are equally wonderful and fulfilling. Joy has also been experienced along with serenity, contentment, passion, fun and stillness.

I think the difference between now and fifteen years ago is: I am experiencing JOY in my soul rather than my head. I was trying too hard, dissecting it, defining it, wanting to be JOY perfect. Since then and after all the hard work I have done, I am into letting it go (whatever IT is), loving myself and others, forgiving myself and others and just BEING.
Therefore, I have been more open and free to feel JOY.

All kinds of JOY.

Joy in the scent of a cinnamon candle or a Heritage rose blossom.

Joy delighting in the play of my golden retrievers or a hug of support from a dear friend.

Joy in setting my eyes on the majesty of Long’s Peak or my grandson in his Halloween costume.

Joy in a friend’s words of affinity or a poem by Mary Oliver.

I could make a list that went on for pages and pages. Which to me is a miracle!!!

Joy I have found is wherever and whatever we choose to call it.
May you find JOY.

2 comments:

  1. We spend our lives waiting for things like joy to happen to us. Why does it take so long to figure out we make our own? Thanks Deb!

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  2. Great post, Deb, and great picture of joy in action.

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